BIT PART ISN’T BAD AT ROCK CEREMONIES

BIT PART ISN’T BAD AT ROCK CEREMONIES

OK, I know, I’m a week late on this Rock and Roll Hall of Fame thing, but I have a good excuse: I was playing in the concert.No, not that concert. Not the six-hour, Saturday night blowout, which was broadcast around the world and featured rockers from all eras...
BIT PART ISN’T BAD AT ROCK CEREMONIES

U.S. Open Who’S No. 1?Since The Knife, ‘Don’T Think’ Is Seles Salvation

NEW YORK — The glittering stage above the mosh pit at the MTV Video Awards is a strange place to find a female U.S. Open tennis champion — especially the night before a big match. But there was Monica Seles at Radio City Music Hall on Thursday, live, in front of millions of viewers, giggling and reading off the cue cards. Seles, in her clipped English, announced the contenders for some award, “Hootie and the Blowfish” and “Michael and Janet Jackson” and then she came to a video with a rather strange name.

BIT PART ISN’T BAD AT ROCK CEREMONIES

I Return Because Readers Are What Matters The Most

Enough.

The summer is over, school buses are rolling, people are back to work.

And so am I.

Not as a symbol. I am not here because I side with management in this wretched newspaper strike, nor am I here to be a union spy. I did not come back for money, and I plan to give much of what I earn to the people still on strike.

BIT PART ISN’T BAD AT ROCK CEREMONIES

British Horse Likes Beer, But Doesn’T Say ‘Busch!’

LOUISVILLE, Ky. — What could be more American than drinking beer and not showering after a workout? Hey, half my college roommates fit that description. So it’s very comforting to find a guy with similar habits right here at the Kentucky Derby. Only the guy isn’t American. Nor, when you get right down to it, is he a guy. He is a horse.

A British horse.

BIT PART ISN’T BAD AT ROCK CEREMONIES

British Tv Can Get Anyone Off The Boil

LONDON — Last week at Wimbledon, American Pete Sampras caused a stir when he said there was “nothing to watch” on British television. Bloody hell! The Brits went bonkers! At least the Brits who weren’t watching TV. Those who were, naturally, were sound asleep.

Sampras was not completely correct. There is, in fact, something to watch on British TV — but that something usually involves the beetle and its mating habits.

BIT PART ISN’T BAD AT ROCK CEREMONIES

Without Seles, Steffi Unbeatable

WIMBLEDON, England — You can’t play tennis against a mirror, so Steffi Graf must settle for the women they put in front of her. They are not as good as she is. They are not as haunting as her lonesome quest for perfection. They do not spook her, or cause her to lose sleep. She can beat them all, even when she stumbles.

She stumbled often against Jana Novotna in Thursday’s semifinal. Graf double-faulted. Graf foot-faulted. Graf hit long. Graf whiffed at Novotna’s serve. Whiffed? As in “swing and a miss”?

Yep. And she still won.

BIT PART ISN’T BAD AT ROCK CEREMONIES

A Bug-Eyed Day At Wimbledon

WIMBLEDON, England — Here is the reason I will never be a world-class tennis player: I refuse to let a ball girl stick her finger in my eye.

This, apparently, is a new requirement at Wimbledon, based on the behavior of Shuzo Matsuoka, a tall Japanese tennis ace. Shuzo is the first man from Japan to reach the quarterfinals here since 1933.

He also travels with his own karaoke machine.

You think a finger in the eye is gonna stop him?