It was late at night and snow was falling. I was driving home over the bridge. Suddenly, I spotted an old man standing on a girder, staring down into the icy water. He was wearing a T-shirt with the sleeves rolled up, his hair greased back in a James Dean style. There was a tattoo on his arm and a cigarette dangling from his lips. I recognized him as a character I hadn't seen in a while, Mr. Macho.He squatted as if to jump."DON'T DO IT!" I screamed. He glared at me. "Why the hell not?'"Because you have plenty to live for."
THE LIVE ALBOM* My shock of the week: carob raisins, vegetarian burritos and hazelnut coffee at Tiger Stadium. Next thing you know, the dugout will have a hardwood floor and a Miro poster.* And Pachabel on the loudspeakers. * By the way, you think that Home Run Bar in Tiger Plaza is large enough? Take that, and the giant daiquiri stand, and on a hot day, you might as well roll the paddy wagon right up to the gates. * Eric Montross, I know Dolph Lundgren. I worked with him. You, sir, are no Dolph Lundgren.Eric's reality Eric's dream
LOS ANGELES -- Sinbad, the comedian, took the envelope, broke the seal, and read aloud:"And the winner, for best original song, is . . . "My hands were sweating. My heart raced. How embarrassing! A few months back, when someone called to say a song I had written had been nominated for a Cable Ace Award, my reaction was more noble: I laughed. Cable? Awards? I kept thinking of this "Saturday Night Live" skit, in which a man bursts on stage to accept "Best Weather Map.""I want to thank my mother!" he gushes. "People said this couldn't be done. . . . "
"Holy Motormouths, Batman!"Jimmy Carson, when asked to describe Shawn BurrHe was 2 years old when he first heard the voices. They came from downstairs. Laughing. Talking. All these wonderful sounds. He had to join them. He pulled himself over his crib and wandered down the steps."Shawn, what are you doing down here?" his parents said. They laughed and apologized to their guests. They carried their baby upstairs. In the crib. Kiss goodnight.Five minutes later, he was back."Shawn, what are you doing out again?"
MINNEAPOLIS -- The elbow flew, it made contact, and suddenly, Chris Webber was Rocky, taking the whack and hitting the deck, as the crowd noise swirled like a jet engine on dope. He was halfway to la-la land, head on the floor, eyes wet with ooze. You could almost hear Burgess Meredith yelling, "Stay down! Stay down!" Jalen Rose leaned over him. Steve Fisher leaned over him. The trainer, Dave Ralston, leaned over him.What do doctors tell you when your nose is broken? 1) Take it easy. 2) Avoid stress. 3) Avoid contact. Above all, avoid contact.
EAST LANSING -- To understand George Perles you must first understand the wall in his office. He points to it constantly. Look. The photos. Those famous men, beaming down at him like destiny. Biggie Munn. Duffy Daugherty. Jack Breslin. His ancestors in the athletic department."People may not believe it," he says, gazing at their faces, "but I did what I did because of those guys."
Great. As if Michael Jordan wasn't enough, now we've got to deal with Bill Murray? That's right. Bill Murray. The actor. The comedian. Mr. Ghostbuster himself . . . A Bulls fan?He told me so. The other day. Said he might just show up at a Detroit-Chicago playoff game, ready to taunt the Pistons. "Maybe I'll wear one of those Bill Laimbeer masks," he said. "You know, I heard Laimbeer never really suffered a cheek injury. He's just having his face lifted. It's true. He's getting redone so he can do TV work when he's finished with basketball."
Barry Sanders has something on his mind. He walks over to Jim Arnold, the punter, and sits on a stool nearby. Arnold is talking to a reporter, but his words grow jumpy as he glances at Sanders just sitting there -- What does he want? Why doesn't he interrupt? -- and finally, Arnold stops talking to the reporter altogether. It is damn near impossible to ignore Barry Sanders, even if he is sitting still."What's up?" Arnold asks."I need a favor from you, man," Sanders says."Name it." Sanders grins, sort of embarrassed. "Nah, really, man," he says.
Mitch Albom writes about running an orphanage in impoverished Port-au-Prince, Haiti, his kids, their hardships, laughs and challenges, and the life lessons he’s learned there every day.
