FAIR WARNING, ERIC — PICK UP AN EXTRA SIX-PACK

This is something I’ve always wondered about. When a team plays a game on a Thursday — as the Lions did a few days ago — what do they do on Sunday afternoons?

Do they watch the other games on TV?

Does Eric Hipple invite Joe Ferguson and Chuck Long over to his house, and open a six-pack of beer and a box of pretzels?

And what does his wife say?

Does she come downstairs, shake her head and say, “I don’t know what you see in that game. Why don’t you do something constructive, like rake the leaves?”

She couldn’t really say that, could she?

And what about the coach? Does Darryl Rogers sit in his easy chair, one hand on the remote control, and say things like, “Fourth-and-one and he’s going for it? What an idiot! I could coach better than that guy!”

And does his wife say, “Sure you could, dear” and go back to her magazine?

She couldn’t really say that, could she?

And what about the linemen? Do they sit there, knee-deep in hero sandwiches, and watch a particularly mean hit and say, “Ooooh, this game is getting so violent.”

They couldn’t really say that, could they?

I wonder about this sort of thing. Don’t ask me why. I just do. And I am going to Eric Hipple’s house, right now, to peek in his windows.

But first, the picks . . .

PACKERS 44, LIONS 40: I see a punt. I see a punt return. I see Darryl Rogers pulling his hair out. I see all this. Don’t ask me how.

RAMS 21, JETS 20: The Jets are becoming the NFL’s answer to a M*A*S*H unit.

DOLPHINS 35, FALCONS 21: Don Shula has a new contract. Dan Marino has a new contract. This is their worst season together. Hmmmm.

CHIEFS 21, BILLS 14: The new Buffalo turned out to be the old Buffalo.

PATRIOTS 19, SAINTS 17: As long as someone takes away Irving Fryar’s car keys, everything will be fine.

BROWNS 31, OILERS 19: Another AFC Central Division thriller. Oh, boy.

RAIDERS 30, EAGLES 10: Didn’t these teams play in a Super Bowl? Wasn’t Tom Flores coaching LA? Wasn’t a tough-talking guy running Philly? Didn’t the Eagles lose? Yes, they did.

CHARGERS 21, COLTS 17: Is this the week Indianapolis finally wins one? Finally, finally, finally . . . ? Nah.

BRONCOS 17, BENGALS 10: Cincinnati wins when it shouldn’t. Denver loses when it shouldn’t. So, what? I guess neither team wins this week? Is that it?

REDSKINS 24, CARDINALS 20: Part of me says St. Louis will win this one and pull off the upset of the year. It’s a small part, though.

VIKINGS 35, BUCCANEERS 6: Minnesota has been waiting to beat up on somebody for weeks. And along comes . . . Tampa Bay.

SEAHAWKS 31, COWBOYS 14: I see Dave Krieg having a field day. I see the Cowboys looking like turkeys. I see all this. Don’t ask me how.

BEARS 10, STEELERS 9: Just try to slam a Bears quarterback this week. Just try it.

49ERS 23, GIANTS 20 (MONDAY NIGHT): Last week the Jets. This week the Giants. Monday night is not a good time for New Yorkers. Not at all.

BEST PICK LAST WEEK: Seahawks 17, Eagles 14. Seahawks won, 24-20.

WORST PICK LAST WEEK: Cowboys 23, Redskins 21. The Redskins won, 41-14.

RECORD LAST WEEK: 9-5

RECORD FOR SEASON: 122-45-1

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