Isn’t it amazing how time flies? It seems like just yesterday Dexter Manley was suspended for 30 days of training camp. And now the season is about to end, and ol’ Dex is going home for the holidays.
Yes, it’s true. Today is the final Sunday of the 1988 NFL regular season. What will we miss once this season ends?
And what won’t we miss?
Funny you should ask.
We will all miss John Elway, very much, really; it’s a shame he won’t make the playoffs.
We will not miss any of his receivers.
We will all miss Vinny Testaverde, who gave so much so that others could celebrate, usually in the Tampa Bay end zone.
We will not miss Joe Gibbs.
We will surely miss all the fun we’ve had trying to translate the NFL’s tie-breaker rules into English.
We will not miss the instant replay.
We will miss Wayne Fontes, should he not get the Lions’ head coaching job for next year.
We will not miss Darryl Ri . . . uh, Ru . . . uh, what was his name again?
And now this week’s picks. . . .
DETROIT 21, TAMPA BAY 16: Wouldn’t it be something if the Lions finally decided to offer the job to Fontes — and he was hired away by another team?
CINCINNATI 20, WASHINGTON 17: I see overtime. I see a field goal. I feel very strongly about this one.
MIAMI 28, PITTSBURGH 12: Dan Marino returns home to Pittsburgh, wins big game, hangs out with friends and says, “Hey youse guys, whassup?” all night long.
SAN DIEGO 3, KANSAS CITY 0: Walt Terrell pitches a shutout. Jack Clark homers.
DENVER 21, NEW ENGLAND 10: A wild guess.
CLEVELAND 17, HOUSTON 16: I’m going with courage, guts and faith in a crippled Bernie Kosar. Also, I picked the Browns for the Super Bowl back in September and if they lose this, they’re out.
NY GIANTS 23, NY JETS 16: So Lawrence Taylor wants to be traded? He’s tired of New York pressure? Great. Send him to Green Bay. Nobody will bother him there.
PHILADELPHIA 24, DALLAS 10: Buddy goes to playoffs. Ditka gags.
INDIANAPOLIS 19, BUFFALO 17: The Bills keep saying, “Is it playoff time yet?”
NEW ORLEANS 21, ATLANTA 12: So hot, so cold. The Saints and Falcons make no sense to me whatsoever.
LA RAIDERS 13, SEATTLE 9: Whoever wins the AFC West should withdraw from the playoffs out of embarrassment.
PHOENIX 20, GREEN BAY 3: Hey, Cardinals. Remember the good old days, three weeks ago, when you were in first place?
SAN FRANCISCO 20, LA RAMS 17: Battle for California. Winner gets a flotation tank.
(MONDAY NIGHT) MINNESOTA 24, CHICAGO 16: Before the Vikings’ loss to Green Bay, this would have been the hottest game of the season. Now it may lose the ratings battle to a PBS special. RECORD LAST WEEK: 10-4. SEASON RECORD: 139-70-1. LAST WEEK VS. SPREAD: 6-8. SEASON VS. SPREAD: 102-105-3. BEST PICK LAST WEEK: NY Giants 20, Kansas City 12 (Giants won, 28-12). WORST PICK LAST WEEK: Minnesota 88, Green Bay 0 (Green Bay won, 18-6).