HE’S JUST PLAIN JUDNO-FRILLS HEATHCOTE STANDS JUST OUTSIDE SPOTLIGHT
EAST LANSING — So this is what Jud Heathcote does in the thick of the supposedly pressure-packed Big Ten title chase: He finds out one of his secretaries is pregnant, but she didn’t want to tell him because things are so busy right now. The next day, Jud...
BRIDGING THE GAP BETWEEN TRUMPS
Personally, and I think I speak for many Americans when I say this, I would like to push Donald Trump off a bridge. But I can’t do that because 1) I have to shovel the driveway this morning, and 2) Mike Tyson is a friend of Trump’s. I don’t care how...
Look Around And Tap History On The Shoulder
He used to practice on the metal flap doors that dotted the sidewalks of Harlem. Tappety-tap-tap-tappety-tip. When it got too cold, he danced in the hallways of nearby apartment buildings. Tappety-tip-tip-tappety-tap.
One day, when he was 14, a fellow “hoofer” knocked on his door, said they needed somebody up at the Apollo, quick, let’s go. A few breathless minutes later, he was auditioning in the basement of the most famous theater in his universe, just him and his dream and the silver plates on his shoes. Tappety- tappety-tappety-tip!
Pay Scale Dispute? Hey, No Problem!
If I were in charge of baseball, there would be no spring training lockout. I would simply take the two negotiators, Donald Fehr and Chuck O’Connor, stick them in a hotel room, tie them to the bedpost alongside a drooling German Shepherd and have the door hermetically sealed. Then I would inform the world that they had run off to Mexico together. And the players and owners, none of whom really know what’s going on anyhow, would shrug and say, “Well, shoot,
(spit) heck, (scratch) let’s play ball.”
RECRUITING WARS MAKE OUR MAN A LITTLE RANK
MEMO TO: Coach BigFROM: Your humble assistant RE: Recruiting ProgressWell, boss, I thought you’d like a report from the field, seeing as we’re down to the BIG DAY in this year’s recruiting war. Besides, I’ve been sleeping on this kid’s...
George Perles: It Had To Be Him; Spartans’ Ad Is Obsessed With Tradition
EAST LANSING — To understand George Perles you must first understand the wall in his office. He points to it constantly. Look. The photos. Those famous men, beaming down at him like destiny. Biggie Munn. Duffy Daugherty. Jack Breslin. His ancestors in the athletic department.
“People may not believe it,” he says, gazing at their faces, “but I did what I did because of those guys.”
HELP IN NET MUST BE RED WINGS’ TOP GOAL
In the heat of the ice war, when the bodies are slamming and the hearts are pumping and the fans are banging on the glass, it is possible, just for a moment, to forget the problems. It is possible to forget that the confidence on this team is down to fumes, that...
The Buddha Train Pistons Hitch A Ride On Edwards’ Late-Rising Star
He likes boats. You probably didn’t know that. He keeps one in a Detroit marina, complete with bathroom, shower, microwave, couch — “That ain’t a boat, that’s a house!” says teammate Mark Aguirre — and sometimes during the season he’ll go down and sit in that boat, not going anywhere, just rocking on the water and taking it all in.
Forecast: Maps, More Maps, And Hair Spray
Today we will deal with the very important subject of forecasting the weather, which began, of course, in prehistoric days, when groups of cavemen sat in a circle, looking at the sky, until one of them finally stood up and clubbed his wife over the head. Then they all went home.
You have to admire that kind of thinking. The caveman knew he had absolutely no control over the weather, so why bother?
Modern man is not so smart. Modern man wants Information. Especially Weather Information. How else do we explain the local TV news?
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