WIMBLEDON, England — “Hello?”
“Is Boris in?”
“Who’s calling?”
“Just put the little twerp on the phone.”
“One moment, Mr. McEnroe.”
“. . . Hello?”
“Boris?”
“Yon?”
“THAT’S JOHN, YOU PEA-BRAIN!”
“Zorry.”
“Forget it. Look. I saw what happened Friday at Wimbledon. You shouldn’t have lost. Second round? The defending champion? No way.”
“I know. I am better player than dis Peter Doohan. But he heet shots dat ver unbeleeevable! He vas vantastic! He vas-“
THE LIVE ALBOM
* Now that basketball, hockey and Gerry Cooney are finally finished, maybe we can get on with summer. Which means, of course, it is time for our summer sports reading list. You won’t want to miss such sizzling best-sellers as:
TORONTO — The ball went flying high into center field and Chet Lemon waved, he got it, the final out, and that was that. Alan Trammell stood at shortstop, watched the catch, then trotted in with the rest of his teammates.
The game was won.
The streak was over.
INGLEWOOD, Calif. — They were dancing on the court with nine minutes still left to go. The score was Lakers 85, Celtics 70, time-out was called, and the Laker cheerleaders grabbed fans from the front-row seats and, ho, the heck with Celtic comebacks! They did the victory shimmy right there on the Forum hardwood, fans and showgirls, as the crowd screamed along with the thumping public address system:
“WE LOVE L-A! . . . “
“WE LOVE IT!”
BOSTON — The first one came with the final seconds dripping away in the first half. Greg Kite threw him the ball off a rebound and Danny Ainge started dribbling downcourt, but, time, time, there wasn’t enough time, so he heaved it, he just heaved it while he was running, a desperation shot from 40 feet. And the ball went up, up, came down, down. . . . Bang.
By the end, even the Pistons looked tired of this series. It was like trying to put a swing set together with the wrong tools. At some point, you just plop down, exasperated, and say: “This is never gonna work.”
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