YOU TAKE MANHATTAN — MAKE A RUN-DMC FOR IT

THE LIVE ALBOM

* Now that basketball, hockey and Gerry Cooney are finally finished, maybe we can get on with summer. Which means, of course, it is time for our summer sports reading list. You won’t want to miss such sizzling best-sellers as:

“Just Breaking My Fall” — Bill Laimbeer’s guide to amateur wrestling.
“You Be Ilitch” — The remarkable story of the Detroit Red Wings, as told by Run-DMC.
“The Three Amibos”‘ — Schembechler, Jackson and Derek tell of their early days on the family farm, helping Daddy Belinksy milk the cows.
“YOU take Manhattan” — An anthology of tales by Jack McCloskey, Chuck Daly, Rick Pitino, Don Nelson, Winnie The Wonder Seal, and everyone else who has turned down a job with the Knicks this year.
“Next?” — The Mike Tyson story. MATCH THE SMILES AND WIN BIG PRIZES!

1. Magic Johnson 1. Michael Spinks 1. Archie Bell 2. Don Johnson 2. Leon Spinks 2. Archie Moore 3. Mason Reese 3. Their Dentist 3. Peter Ueberroth When people ask why I’m proud to live in Detroit, I tell them this: Only 16 seats were sold at Joe Louis Arena for the closed- circuit telecast of Michael Spinks vs. Gerry Cooney. You hear that? Sixteen. That shows taste and intelligence. By the way, now that Spinks has beaten him, Cooney can return to stand-up comedy. He had a nice career going under the name Jay Leno.

More books:
“Skin It, Babe” — Marvin Hagler, Jerry Tarkanian and Jack Ramsay collaborate on this special guide to men’s hair fashions.
“Chew This” — The Ricky Mahorn diet book.
“Did I Say That?” — The collected wisdom of coach Lefty Driesell. In large type.

Well, Wimbledon begins next week and the men’s favorites are named Ivan and Boris. I am bringing my fright mask and Halloween bag. Speaking of Wimbledon, I saw a very exciting commercial on HBO Wednesday. It showed John McEnroe cursing and swinging as the announcer proclaims “MAC IS BACK.” Great stuff. Too bad McEnroe pulled out of the tournament Monday.

Much was made about Lakers forward James Worthy’s “disappearing” in LA’s championship games at Boston Garden. Actually he slipped out during those games to record a few cuts for his new album — tentatively titled “Am I Worthy?” — under his stage name, Teddy Pendergrass.

* I’d like to make all the Grand Prix drivers in town feel right at home: WELCOME . . . TO . . . DEE– rrrrRRRRRR! percent$Ayee! . . . TROIT! Can you believe Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, already 40, just signed a new, two-year contract worth $5 million? The highest-paid man in sports at 42? I like Kareem. But Jerry Buss must have had a pen in one hand and an empty cognac bottle in the other. Speaking of Kareem, isn’t it funny that we never see him and Peter Parker at the same time?

CUTLINES: Gentleman Gerry Gentleman Jay The Amazing . . . Jabbar-Man? 1. Magic Johnson 1. Michael Spinks 1. Archie Bell 2. Don Johnson 2. Leon Spinks 2. Archie Moore 3. Mason Reese 3. Their Dentist 3. Peter Ueberroth Ready, James? Ready . . . Teddy?

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