EVEN WITHOUT STAR SANDERS, LIONS ARE BETTER THAN VIKES

* Lions 17, Vikings 16: And the wind cries . . . Barry.

* Pittsburgh 14, New England 7: That was for all you Jimi Hendrix fans.

* Houston 20, Atlanta 10: Mitch Williams and Jerry Glanville in the same city at the same time? There’ll be a shortage of cowboy boots, motorcycles and straitjackets.
* Green Bay 14, Chicago 10: Is it just me, or does Dave Wannstedt need to trim one side of his mustache to get it even?
* New York Jets 17, Indianapolis 10: You now just say the words “Indianapolis Colts” and I fall asleep.
* Buffalo 24, LA Raiders 16: Both of these teams got everybody’s hopes up. Both of them are playing way below expectations. Both of them should be forced to listen to Beavis and Butt-head’s new album. Twice.
* New Orleans 17, Cleveland 16: It’s official. Bill Belichick has now moved to a Super 8 motel along I-75.
* Washington 1, Tampa Bay 0: The last time the Bucs were favored to win a game was one year ago. They lost that one, too.
* Denver 19, San Diego 14: If the Chargers sink much lower, they’ll be in Mexico.
* Kansas City 17, Seattle 9: Don’t tell me how he’s feeling. Don’t tell me if he’s playing. Don’t tell me what muscles he’s stretching. I don’t want to hear any more about the guy. I am over-Joed.
* Phoenix 9, LA Rams 0: Who cares?
* Miami 21, NY Giants 14: It’s official. The Dolphins are starting George Burns at quarterback, due to his youth advantage over Steve DeBerg.
* San Francisco 28, Cincinnati 7: The Bengals are underdogs by 24 points! And this comes after their best week of the season!
* (Monday night) Dallas 35, Philadelphia 7: Remember that old Sly Stone song
“Stand”? The Eagles now play that in their locker room, as a motivational tape.
* Best pick last week: San Francisco 30, LA Rams 10 (49ers won, 35-10).
* Worst pick last week: LA Raiders 12, Cincinnati 7 (Bengals won, 16-10).
* Record last week: 11-3.
* Record vs. spread: 8-6.
* Season record: 104-50.
* Season vs. spread: 70-81-3.

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