THE LIVE ALBOM:
* Well now, let’s– BALK!
* begin wit– BALK!
* some baseb– BALK!
* Never mind.
* Tiger Mike Henneman is strong in short elief. ButI enjoyed him as Chevy Chase in Comic Relief.
* Listen. Please. I’d rather not talk about Willie (Guillermo) Hernandez anymore. Willie (Guillermo) and I get along now. I wish Willie (Guillermo) well. And I will try to spell his name (names) right.
* It’s Friday. The Orioles must be 0-15.
* BO SCHEMBECHLER’S FIRST DAY AS ATHLETIC DIRECTOR:
BO: YOU CALL THIS A DESK? WHAT KIND OF *$!*! DESK IS THIS! YOU! PAPER CLIPS! GET THE HELL IN THE DRAWER!
CLIPS: Yes sir!
BO: STAPLER! DROP AND GIVE ME 20!
STAPLER: Yes, sir!
BO: PENS! OVER HERE! TAPE! OVER THERE! NONE OF YOU WILL EVER PLAY A DOWN ON A MICHIGAN DESK . . .
* Many people admire St. Louis Blues coach Jacques Martin for the way he took over the team last year. I admire the way he finishes the game and gets back to the studios in time to do the Bernie Smilovitz sports segment on Channel 4.
* It’s nice to hear Jacques Demers and Steve Yzerman say that Yzerman could be back by the next playoff round. But until a doctor says it — and until a doctor says it with the words “no risk” — any decent coach would keep Yzerman right where he is.
* And this is from a sports writer who thinks Yzerman is terrific.
* A puck knocks out Glen Hanlon. A goalpost knocks out Yzerman. A teammate knocks out Shawn Burr. Geez. I thought it was the opponents you were supposed to worry about.
* I have been waiting to say this for three years: In trading for Kansas City’s first two draft picks Wednesday, THE LIONS FRONT OFFICE ACTUALLY MADE A GOOD MOVE!
* Boy, that felt good.
* The only thing that worries me about that trade is the Raiders’ Al Davis, a man who does not like to be outmanuevered. If I were the Lions, I wouldn’t accept any mail that was ticking.
* Not that I would accept it as anyone else.
* How come every table I sit at in a fast food joint has one leg shorter than the rest, so that it wobbles? I mean, is that a requirement or something?
* Pistons. Playoffs. Coming. Finally.
* Oh that Chuck Daly. He’s such a Joker. Mitch Albom will sign copies of his book, “The Live Albom,” today noon to 2 p.m. at Little Professor Book Center, 1445 W. Fourteen Mile, Madison Heights; today 6 p.m. to 7:30 p.m. at Book Break, 44720 Ford, Canton; Saturday 10 a.m. to noon at the Book Stall, 113 E. Main, Flushing; and Saturday 2 p.m. to 4 p.m. at iBrowse, Orchard Lake and Northwestern Highway, West Bloomfield.
CUTLINE: Mikey as … Chevy? Martin sez: We’ve got . . . highlights! Chuck…. Chuck?