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NETWORK GURUS HOPE THIS BIRDIE WILL FLY

by | Feb 28, 1993 | Detroit Free Press | 0 comments

NEWS ITEM: “The Golf Channel,” a 24-hour cable network devoted entirely to the sport of golf, was announced recently. Programming is yet to be determined, but creators promise “a non-stop feast” of shows dealing with the nation’s new No. 1 pastime.

TV GUIDE 1994 . . .

* 6:00 a.m. Golfcenter.
* 6:30 Good FORE-ning, America!
* 6:55 Masters Update. Live coverage of sunrise at Augusta National.
* 7:00 The 700 Club. World’s worst golfers share their misery.
* 7:45 Body by Jake. Golfer Peter Jacobsen demonstrates slouching, slumping and how to pick a nice white belt.
* 8:30 Golfcenter.
* 8:45 Golf! Live! Practice-round action from the Nabisco Federal Express Mr. Coffee Hertz Prudential Jamie Farr Classic in Toledo, Ohio.
* 9:00 Regis & Kathie & Lee. Lee Trevino joins famous morning talkers and does what many have wanted to do for years: clubs them over the head with a pitching wedge.
* 10:00 Geraldo! Golfers who cross-dress.
* 10:30 Oprah! Men who sleep with putters,
* 11:00 All In The Family. The Bunkers.
* 11:30 M*A*S*H. Amateur golf swings.
* 11:55 Masters Update. Live coverage of grass growing at Augusta National Coverage from Azinger to Zoeller
* Noon Golfcenter.
* 12:15 p.m. Golf! Live! (Rerun) Second-round action from the Wal-Mart Amoco Sunkist Xerox Merrill Lynch Junior Amateur Rainbow Classic, at Maui, Hawaii.
* 12:30 At the Links With Siskel & Ebert. The famous critics give thumbs up or down on golfers’ styles and personalities. This week, Gene and Roger disagree on whether Fred Couples is actually dead or really that dull.
* 1:00 Young & Restless. With John Daly.
* 1:30 One Stroke To Live.
* 2:00 All My Titlists.
* 2:30 Golfcenter.
* 2:45 Golf! Live! Rainout action from the Buick Kraft PaineWebber General Electric Mobil Weed Eater Senior Golf Classic from Sleepy Hollow, Wash.
* 3:00 Film: “Driving, Miss Daisy.” Aging chauffeur teaches widow how to hit tee shot.
* 4:00 News At Fore!
* 4:30 Sea Hunt. Craig Stadler (The Walrus) leads scenic tour of the world’s best water traps.
* 5:00 Bogey Film Festival.
* 5:55 Masters Update. Live coverage of hedge trimming at Augusta National. But don’t look for putt putt
* 6:00 Golfcenter.
* 6:15 Golf! Live! Greens-keeping action from the Pebble Beach General Mills Turtle Wax Smith Barney Coca-Cola Invitational Junior Women’s Championships, at Montego Bay, Jamaica.
* 7:00 Murder, She Wrote. Golfers’ wives discuss plans for the future.
* 7:30 Rescue 911. Medics perform Heimlich maneuver on Greg Norman, who’s been choking for years.
* 8:00 Film: “Hook.” Dustin Hoffman and Robin Williams star as Pirates who can’t hit the green.
* 9:00 The Wonder Years. Narrator (Daniel Stern) reflects on good old days, when hardest part of life was getting ball to go through windmill.
* 10:00 America’s Funniest Golf Videos.
* 10:30 Knots Landing. Don Knots goes looking for the ball he hit in 1965.
* 10:55 Masters Update. Live coverage of night watchman making rounds at Augusta National.
* 11:00 Golfcenter.
* 11:15 Golf! Live! Sprinkler action from the Mountain Dew Minolta Virginia Slims British Petroleum Northwest Airlines Invitational Lefties-Only Championship, at Walnut Creek, Calif.
* 11:30 In Living Color. Fashion designers discuss golf pants and how to put them out in case of fire.
* Midnight Nightline. Golf in the Persian Gulf. Should you play through?
* 1:00 a.m. Film: “The Bells Of St. Andrews.” Santa Claus visits Scotland with his 3-iron.
* 2:00 Golfcenter.
* 2:15 Golf! Live! Final-round action from Honda Goodyear Wendy’s Nutter-Butter H.R. Block Senior Womens’ Invitational Classic at Miami Beach.
* 2:30 Film: “The Sands of Iwo Jima.” John Wayne stars as man caught in world’s largest bunker.
* 3:55 Masters Update. Live coverage of groundhog running across fairway at Augusta National.
* 4:00 Deep Thoughts. By Jack Nicklaus.
* 4:15 Morning benediction. Handicappers.
* 4:20 Morning benediction. Non-handicappers.

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