* Green Bay 20, New Orleans 19: Reggie White’s a minister, the opposition’s called the Saints, and the game is played on Sunday. Do we watch, or genuflect?

* Houston 30, Cincinnati 7: Secret negotiations were under way this week to have Don Shula transfer some of his 324 victories to his son David through the Emergency Relief Fund.

* Miami 24, Philadelphia 9: Steve DeBerg plays for Miami. Afterward, he goes home and watches his favorite TV show, “Golden Girls.”
* San Francisco 30, Tampa Bay 6: This week, it’s Jimmy Williams who gets shoved.
* NY Giants 24, Washington 14: The Redskins have become a real stand-up team. If you can stand up, you play.
* Atlanta 20, LA Rams 17: That was a nice little career for T.J. Rubley wasn’t it? One start, one bye week, and back to the bench.
* Cleveland 21, Seattle 20: Todd Philcox, backed by Tom Tupa, waiting for Vinny Testaverde. It sounds like a bad team in the Canadian League.
* LA Raiders 12, Kansas City 10: No truth to the rumor that Dire Straits is redoing “Money For Nothing” and dedicating it to Joe Montana.
* Denver 27, Minnesota 14: As soon as it starts snowing in Denver, the Broncos gain three points in the spread.
* NY Jets 20, Indianapolis 10: Will wonders never cease? Jeff George threw a couple of touchdown passes last week and didn’t ask to be traded, renegotiated or carried off the field in a ricksha.
* Dallas 28, Phoenix 3: Bernie Kosar at the helm. Jimmy Johnson on the sideline. All they need is Bennie Blades and Brett Perriman and they have a Hurricanes reunion.
* San Diego 24, Chicago 7: Fuzzy Wuzzy was a Bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. No offense, either.
* Pittsburgh 17, Buffalo 10 (Monday night): Why do I have a feeling we’ll be seeing this game again in, say, January?
* Best pick last week: LA Raiders 14, Chicago 13 (Raiders won, 16-14).
* Worst pick last week: Miami 23, NY Jets 20 (Jets won, 27-10).
* Record last week: 7-5.
* Record vs. spread: 5-6-1.
* Season record: 75-39.
* Season vs. spread: 47-64-3.

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