THE LIVE ALBOM:
* Well, it’s about time to go back to school. Amongst the fall sports classes you can take this semester:
* “Money Management for the 1990s” with professor Bill Davidson.
* “Money Management for the 1950s” with professor William Clay Ford.
* “Money Management for the 1890s” with professor Jim Campbell.
* I’ve been trying to reach our editor, Heath Meriwether, for the last few days. He never returns my calls. Imagine my surprise last night when I turned on the TV and saw him coaching the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame.
* Speaking of college football, Notre Dame and Michigan seem to be consensus choices for the national championship. Personally, I don’t think either will win it. It’s never the team you predict.
* By the way, it is true that some bookstores will feature a life-size stand-up of Bo Schembechler promoting his new autobiography, “Bo.” It is not true that the stand-up will make you take a lap if you don’t buy a copy.
* James Jones will not be missed, except as a person. Nice guy. But he was done.
* Am I the only one who thinks Wayne Fontes may be over-gushing about rookie Rodney Peete? OK, so he’s promising. But he’s played two exhibition games. What if he gets hurt? The way Fontes is alienating his other quarterbacks, I can see them staring at him on the sidelines and saying, “Sorry, coach. You want a replacement? You go out and throw it.”
* Speaking of Lions quarterbacks, Eric Hipple is protesting his inactivity. I’m surprised — he should be used to it. After all, what has he done since retiring as commissioner of baseball?
* More courses: “Psychology 101: Human Relationships” with professors Wade Boggs, Steve Garvey and Luis Polonia.
* “Crisis Management” with Dr. Sparky Anderson.
* “Math 104: Statistics” with associate professor Pete Rose. (One hundred dollar registration; double-or-nothing if you ace the course.)
* I give Bucky Dent another month.
* In-between practices this week in California, Rodney Peete had time to visit his old friends from “St. Elsewhere,” where he used to work, under his stage name Denzel Washington.
* Not that anyone’s counting, but as of Thursday, Oakland’s Dave Stewart, alone, had as many victories as the Tigers had on the road all season.
* Now that’s depressing.
* I find it fascinating that people were so enthralled with Bill Bonds’
“comeback” speech from alcoholism Monday afternoon. I’m happy for Bill, sure, but I remember doing his show when he absolutely ripped the Red Wings who were out drinking in Edmonton, calling their actions “unforgivable.” Could it be that compassion, too, is an acquired taste?
* How big a Christmas card will Jon Koncak send Jack McCloskey this year? For
what McCloskey did for him, it should come with wheels and air-conditioning.
* Irving Fryar is known for dancing down sidelines for the New England Patriots. You should see him tap dance, under his real name, Gregory Hines.
CUTLINE My boss, Heath . . . Holtz?
“Eric” Hipple “Hipple” Ueberroth Peete’s sake, it’s . . . Denzel? One-two-three . . . Irving?