Detroit Free Press

This time, there was no magic. No Isiah either. This time the Portland Trail Blazers proved that what counts is not how you start but how you finish, and this is how they finished: on top.

Oakland Calif. --They had already stolen Oakland's crown, Oakland's reputation, and Oakland's thunder. Now the Cincinnati Reds were taking Oakland's stadium. One by one they came bursting from the dugout like enemy soldiers storming the castle, to the raucous applause of about 300 Cincinnati boosters -- the only fans left in the Coliseum. It was like a private party late Saturday night. Simply Reds. And soon, the field was a small ocean of Reds jackets, Reds hats, Reds T- shirts.Red October."Ri-jo! Ri-jo!""Sa-bo! Sa-bo!""MARGE!"

ALBERTVILLE, France -- Before I explain why Christopher Bowman is about as real as an Easter egg -- and nearly as fragile -- let me confess something to you, Michelle:I'm a man.And being a man, I will never appreciate figure skating the way women do. Sorry. It's in the genes. Like hair loss. We're just different.WHAT WOMEN WISH: That for one magic moment, they could be like those figure skaters, gliding over the ice as the crowd calls their names.WHAT MEN WISH: That there was a sequel to "Animal House."

Let me get this straight.1) The New York Knicks express interest in Isiah Thomas.2) Isiah goes to Bill Davidson with the news.3) Davidson immediately gives Isiah 10 percent of the team, a vice presidency and a $55 million package to keep him in Detroit.Does the word overreaction come to mind?How about common sense? Because, personally, I can't find any sense in thissupposed deal. To be honest, I wonder whether this is the deal at all. I'm sure Isiah will be taken care of, but $55 million?

NEW YORK -- Andy Warhol said everyone gets his 15 minutes, and I guess I just had mine. Actually, it was only five minutes. With Arnold Schwarzenegger. And one minute with Dyan Cannon. And seven seconds with Donald Trump, who really needs a new haircut. I mean, his hair just kind of creeps up his forehead, like a raccoon climbing a tree. I wanted to say, "Donald. Here's five bucks. Go down to the barber shop, ask for Al. . ."But I digress.

On the one hand, I really don't want to write this column. It's a pretty foolish issue. On the other hand, sometimes foolish issues grow into serious ones, and it's best to nip them in the bud.First, let me say I like Sparky Anderson. I always have. He's a bona fide legend in baseball, even if the Tigers lose the rest of their games this season, which we are praying very hard won't happen.

There goes your old friend baseball. You remember him from a happier time, when he walked with his head high, waving at children and swatting home runs. He is stooped over now, fat and bloated, drunk on his own greed. There is no saving him. No one even wants to try.

CHICAGO -- So there was another bullet in the chamber after all. The Bulls fired, the Pistons went down, and now we are left with 48 minutes of basketball war to determine who gets off the ground and who stays there until next fall.