Like all good heroes, they waited until the final reel of the movie, until you were on the edge of your seat, chewing your fingernails. And suddenly -- ta-da! -- they were Indiana Jones, ducking the spears, dodging the boulders, swinging across the canyon by a single rope. Never a doubt, right? The home team wins? So when it was all over, and the Atlanta Hawks were lying in shreds on the Palace floor -- their hopes of upsetting the champions almost laughable now -- here were the Pistons, blowing on the smoke of their guns and saying "Trust us. We know what we're doing."
There's this story about Fiorello La Guardia, who was mayor of New York during the '30s and '40s. He was serving on police court one cold winter night when a shivering old man was brought before him. The man was charged with stealing a loaf of bread. "My family is starving," the man said.
Have you ever known someone and not seen him for a while and then suddenly he pops up and you say, "Whoa! What happened to him?"I had that reaction the other night. Tiger Stadium. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a New York Yankee taking batting practice. He was small for an athlete and he looked kind of familiar, sort of boyish looking, with close-cropped blond hair and pale skin and a sort of vacant expression, like a surfer waiting for a good wave. He was . . .He was . . .Omigosh. He was Jim Walewander.
It was late at night and snow was falling. I was driving home over the bridge. Suddenly, I spotted an old man standing on a girder, staring down into the icy water. He was wearing a T-shirt with the sleeves rolled up, his hair greased back in a James Dean style. There was a tattoo on his arm and a cigarette dangling from his lips. I recognized him as a character I hadn't seen in a while, Mr. Macho.He squatted as if to jump."DON'T DO IT!" I screamed. He glared at me. "Why the hell not?'"Because you have plenty to live for."
THE LIVE ALBOM* My shock of the week: carob raisins, vegetarian burritos and hazelnut coffee at Tiger Stadium. Next thing you know, the dugout will have a hardwood floor and a Miro poster.* And Pachabel on the loudspeakers. * By the way, you think that Home Run Bar in Tiger Plaza is large enough? Take that, and the giant daiquiri stand, and on a hot day, you might as well roll the paddy wagon right up to the gates. * Eric Montross, I know Dolph Lundgren. I worked with him. You, sir, are no Dolph Lundgren.Eric's reality Eric's dream
LOS ANGELES -- Sinbad, the comedian, took the envelope, broke the seal, and read aloud:"And the winner, for best original song, is . . . "My hands were sweating. My heart raced. How embarrassing! A few months back, when someone called to say a song I had written had been nominated for a Cable Ace Award, my reaction was more noble: I laughed. Cable? Awards? I kept thinking of this "Saturday Night Live" skit, in which a man bursts on stage to accept "Best Weather Map.""I want to thank my mother!" he gushes. "People said this couldn't be done. . . . "
"Holy Motormouths, Batman!"Jimmy Carson, when asked to describe Shawn BurrHe was 2 years old when he first heard the voices. They came from downstairs. Laughing. Talking. All these wonderful sounds. He had to join them. He pulled himself over his crib and wandered down the steps."Shawn, what are you doing down here?" his parents said. They laughed and apologized to their guests. They carried their baby upstairs. In the crib. Kiss goodnight.Five minutes later, he was back."Shawn, what are you doing out again?"
MINNEAPOLIS -- The elbow flew, it made contact, and suddenly, Chris Webber was Rocky, taking the whack and hitting the deck, as the crowd noise swirled like a jet engine on dope. He was halfway to la-la land, head on the floor, eyes wet with ooze. You could almost hear Burgess Meredith yelling, "Stay down! Stay down!" Jalen Rose leaned over him. Steve Fisher leaned over him. The trainer, Dave Ralston, leaned over him.What do doctors tell you when your nose is broken? 1) Take it easy. 2) Avoid stress. 3) Avoid contact. Above all, avoid contact.
Mitch Albom writes about running an orphanage in impoverished Port-au-Prince, Haiti, his kids, their hardships, laughs and challenges, and the life lessons he’s learned there every day.
