PHILADELPHIA -- There were llamas and trapeze artists and the air smelled like horse droppings. The circus had taken over the building where the Stanley Cup finals were being staged, so the players had to dress in one locker room, then take a shuttle bus -- or worse, walk across the parking lot, fully dressed except for their skates -- maybe passing a few clowns and the fire-eating man. All this to get to a second building, across the way, where ice was available.
It's Opening Day here in Detroit, and fans are preparing in the traditional way, shoveling snow.Soon, players will be pulling on their ski masks, and hot dog vendors will stick their hands in boiling water, just to get some feeling back in their fingers. The tarp will be lifted from the field -- so the snow plows can come in -- and once the salt trucks finish in the parking lot, and the umpire is defrosted, finally, the big moment, when the first batter walks to the plate, turns to the catcher and says, "M-m-m-man, even my bleep is cold."And he spits.
As a man who would like to see a Stanley Cup come to Detroit before Bruce Willis makes "Die Hard IV: My Hair Falls Out," I propose a deal with the city of Birmingham. That is the city in which the Red Wings' goalie, Mike Vernon, lives. Birmingham.Here is the deal:If the Wings reach the Stanley Cup finals, you stop drilling your sewers until they capture the title, OK?Or better yet, how about stopping right now? Today? In the second round of the playoffs? Shut 'em down. I'm serious here.
SAN DIEGO -- Well, if the pope can visit Cuba, the Unabomber can confess, and the president can be accused of making whoopee with an intern, I guess the AFC can win a Super Bowl.
What makes one person take a chunk out of another? It is not a question we should have to ask. Yet for the second time this week, I find myself wondering. First it was Mike Tyson's bloody chomp on Evander Holyfield's ear during the weekend.
Normally, when you have a baby, you get hugs from well-wishers, some flowers, maybe balloons. Then you come home from the hospital and begin your new life.That's normally.There is very little normal when a woman gives birth to seven babies at once. And in this country, when something abnormal happens, it can echo forever.Which brings us to the now famous Iowa couple, Ken and Bobbi McCaughey, whose seven new children have become "America's family" -- if family is something you watch and watch over.
In an effort to bond with our hockey friends from California, let's try this exercise at home:Look quickly over your left shoulder.Now quickly over your right. Now left, now right, now left, right, leftrightleftright . . . Congratulations. You now know how a San Jose Shark feels.What was the combined score from Games 1 and 2 of this playoff series? Detroit 12, San Jose 2? That's not hockey, that's target practice. One rumor says the Sharks left town on a plane Tuesday night. A bigger rumor is that they were here at all.
O.J. Simpson had nine months to tell his story. He didn't speak. His lawyers said, "We can't risk it." So he sat silent during his trial, as experts suggested he killed his ex-wife and her friend in cold blood. He sat silent, and he won his freedom. And after the verdict, one of his lawyers admitted, "Had he talked, one mistake would have ruined him."
Mitch Albom writes about running an orphanage in impoverished Port-au-Prince, Haiti, his kids, their hardships, laughs and challenges, and the life lessons he’s learned there every day.
