Detroit Free Press

Ihave been trying to come up with an allegory about fame, one which captures America's love/hate relationship with ...

Helloooo, Larry.Sorry. I always wanted to say that.Anyhow, as your friendly, new-neighborhood columnist, I want to ...

Ladies, gentlemen, faculty, students -- thank you for inviting me to be your commencement speaker.Boooo!Wait. I haven't said anything yet.Boooo!Yes, I know I was a last-minute replacement. Your Republican governor couldn't come because he's afraid of getting booed. Your Democratic senator couldn't come because he's afraid of getting booed. Your rock star alumnus couldn't come because he once wrote a song for the Dixie Chicks. So they asked me.Boooo!

There's a movie out now in which Jim Carrey gets to be God for a while. And I figure, if he can, why can't Joe Dumars? I mean, Carrey never won NBA executive of the year.So, while he is Joe Almighty, here are my suggestions for Dumars' Ten Commandments of the Off-Season.1. THOU SHALT THINK POSTSEASON.

In the days after Jayson Blair resigned in shame from the New York Times, everyone tried to reach him. Television, radio, newspapers, magazines, old friends, colleagues. He spoke to almost no one.But he did call one person -- an agent named David Vigliano about a book and movie deal. Those deals are now in motion. And that's all you need to know about Jayson Blair.

EAST RUTHERFORD, N.J. -- A few days from now, when the Pistons are packing for their summer vacations, this will be a night that will haunt them. Right now they have reasons, justifications, they have moments they can point to, cliches they can fall back on. And they have at least one more game to play.