Detroit Free Press

NEW YORK -- No. No. A thousand red lights no! New York City hosting the Olympic Games? Who came up with this idea? Someone stuck in a taxi, trying to get across town? Yeah, here's what we need. More . . . people!Somehow, in a runoff that makes Mondale-Coleman look normal, New York was selected as America's official bid for the 2012 Summer Games. The city it beat out was -- and I hope you're sitting down -- San Francisco. Right. Because when it comes to late August, where would you rather be -- alongside a breezy Pacific Ocean or inhaling bus fumes in 90-degree heat?

Only in college sports can a school throw the book at itself.And only in college sports do the culprits go free, ...

The biggest problem at Michigan State isn't that it just fired the football coach, or that its star quarterback ...

My ears are for sale. Left. Right. For the right price, you may have them both. Or, I should say, rent them. Your message here. On my ears. I am joining the 21st Century. I am becoming a billboard.Hey. Why should I -- JUST DO IT! -- miss out -- FLY THE FRIENDLY SKIES! -- on the trend? -- THINK FORD FIRST!After all, things you never thought of as advertising space are now becoming -- OBEY YOUR THIRST! -- advertising space. Like police cars.

Try it. You can't do it. You can't name a recent NBA champion that didn't have superstars. The Lakers wear the ...

Hat's off. If you thought he was the devil, then give the devil his due. The Angels may have popped the champagne, but the biggest winner of this all-California World Series was, it turns out, on the losing team. A month ago, Barry Bonds was a giant with a question mark. Now he is a giant exclamation point.

Oh, please. No more. The places on Earth where you can actually find peace and quiet are already dwindling down to inches. Now this? Cell phone makers are on the verge of technology that would allow airline passengers to talk all flight long?Where's the oven? I want to stick my head in it.See whether this sounds familiar. You get on a plane. You settle into your seat. You open a travel magazine. You begin to drift off, thinking of the places you are about to visit, the people you are about to see, and . . .